Thursday, February 17, 2011

A Little Art Journal LOVE

ATTENTION: If you subscribed to this blog because of the experiments I was doing, I just want to warn you, this isn't an experiment post (well, unless you consider art journal pages to be experiments, which, I do). It's an art journal page post. Just didn't want you to get to the end of this post and go "Hey, where's the experiment?". :D

Connie over at Dirty Footprints Studio is hosting an art journal LOVE party this week, not only in honor of Valentine's Day, but as a celebration of when she kicked off Art Journal LOVE Letters (her art journaling online workshop), this time last year. To participate in the party, head on over to her blog by clicking on the pic below:

I realize this blog post has nothing to do with experiments - at all. I haven't done a proper experiment in almost a year, and the last post I did was after another year hiatus. I'm thinking I'm done with the experiments phase of my creative development - at least, on a grand scale.

Know what happened? I actually started DOING art, instead of just experimenting with art supplies. And I gotta tell you, I'm so grateful for all those experiments, because those were my baby steps, my way of getting over the paralyzing FEAR over doing something creative. I have a ridiculous streak of perfectionism, and while I mooned and pined and wished I could make beautiful art journal pages, every time I'd pick up a brush, I'd just about hyperventilate from fear. Fear that it wouldn't look good, fear because I don't know what I'm doing, fear of people pointing and laughing (even if I never showed another soul on this planet - no, fear is not rational), fear of the word "art". My fear/perfectionism usually manifests in a "Why bother?" attitude, as in "It won't be good/better/the best art journal page to ever exist, so why bother? You will FAIL!!"

Nice voice, eh? Do you have one, too? If not in art, in other areas?

So, what's a left-brained girl to do? Fall back on her scientific roots and experiment, that's what. Taking online classes definitely helped, too. Uploading my work into those online classes - yup, that started taking the fear down a peg or too. And having the loving support of an artist friend, who frequently reminds me that this is about the FUN of it all, not the outcome, well, that's been absolutely vital and precious to me.

And somehow, in getting to know all of these wonderful materials, in learning and experimenting, the courage to just begin came through.

I realized as I was typing this out, that what it all took was ACTION. I had to actually DO things to chip away at that snotty little "Why bother?" voice. There was no THINKING my way out of this - it took experiments, learning, talking, and sharing, to get me creating art journal pages now.

Methinks that's a life lesson right there. :D

Anyways, I'm sharing a Valentine-y page I'm working on - all pinks and reds and Love - as part of Connie's Art Journal Blog Party. It's not finished - it's at a place where I'm not sure where to go next. But it's also at a stage that I feel comfortable sharing with all of you. Pretty cool, for someone who couldn't even paint a solid-colored background 3 years ago without freaking out. :D

Pink Love Page

Thank you so much, to those that read and subscribed to this blog. Because I'm changing, the format of this blog will be changing as well. Honestly, I can't see me doing experiments, on the scale I was before. Maybe little ones, like the PanPastel experiment, but no more grand-scale ones. I just want to give anyone that subscribed a heads up about this, in case you start seeing more posts from me, but not the experiments posts you originally signed up for.